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October 24, 2005
25 Days
The lesser grain borer beetle, one of the smallest and most destructive beetles infesting grain in North America, grows from an egg to an adult in 25 days. In the same amount of time, Shawn and I will have gone from living our relatively opulent lives in Boulder to living out of a couple of suitcases and sleeping on a bus.
The adventure awaits, but it seems so distant. It doesn't help that today is our last day of packing, so things are strewn all over the house. After we move it all to storage tomorrow, I think we will feel like we're living in what is only the husk of our former lives.
One positive aspect of our hurried schedule is that I've not had much time to be sad about going. While I look forward to waking up one February morning and looking out the window onto a sunny, 80-degree day, right now the thought leaving friends behind is sad. And despite the best intentions that everyone has to stay in touch, you know that you'll lose a few along the way. Which friends will we never see again? It's strange to walk through the moments that you suspect in the future might be your enduring memories of a place, the way it feels, the people that populate it. It feels like you should be paying so much more attention to all the details. You catch yourself immediately after the moment regretting that you didn't make more of it.
At 25 days left in the United States, that is how it feels. Like I'm living not in the present, but in what are already memories of a very significant time in my life: my last days as an "American."
Posted by crispy at October 24, 2005 03:49 AM