el crispito

You can't walk along the street in any city in Mexico without having it thrust upon you eventually, whether you're ready to deal with it or not. I consider myself a pretty enlightened guy, but even I have been shocked at the level of heterosexuality that is demonstrated in public here.

You read all about how Mexico is a Catholic country, so you think that they might be a little more discreet or that guilt and shame would prevent them from making a scene in public. Yet nothing of the kind is the case. They make out, sit in each other's laps, and perhaps most disturbing of all is when they walk down the street, the male following the female, with his arms draped around her shoulders and without a milimeter of daylight passing between them. How they manage it without falling down is baffling.

They do it with no regard whatsoever for the other people that are about. There could be a million people all strolling by in the plaza, taking in the sun and enjoying the lazy afternoon, and there they'll be, a straight couple going at it like they're the only people in the whole world. You have to scream, throw something at them or take their picture to even get them to notice you, and even then they only stop long enough to shake their fist at you and call you a pendejo before they return to their frenzied mating rituals.

Young Mexicans in Love, Morelia

I have been tempted at times, when I'm passing in a taxi by a particularly amorous couple that is leaning up against a parked car and locked in a passionate kiss, to shout out to them, "GET A ROOM!" but then I realize that they might be like a lot of other Mexicans I've met that don't speak English. Why should I waste my breath? They ought to know better themselves.

Don't get the wrong idea. I'm not against love or its expression, and I don't care what people do in the privacy of their own homes, even if that privacy is actually shared with several other family members. I'm not a heterophobe. I just don't want to have to see the passionate groping of two people driven by lust to an animalistic state of physical indulgence, no matter how arousing it may be.

I understand that it can be hot and sultry here. I know that Latin America is known for its lovers. I accept that coming from the United States, I may be a relative prude. But let's have a little cultural sensitivity for your neighbors from the north! Knock it off, or take it indoors...or at least invite me to join in.