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September 10, 2008
Our Cable Sucks
I used to like our cable. Maybe it's because I didn't know any better and at first, the wide array of Mexican television thrilled me. I could see old Mexican films, wacky game shows, over-emoting telenovela stars and music channels that actually show music videos. Maybe I liked the company because they kept greatly increasing our Internet access speeds with only token (90 cents a month) price increases. Maybe I had better things to do with my time than watch TV.
I know. Everyone hates their cable company. Yet I have started to note that it is not just our cable company, but the channels themselves that are in fact responsible for a large share of the frustration.
We upgraded and paid extra to switch to digital cable. It is not yet going to be mandatory here in Mexico like in the United States, but the package allowed us to get Turner Classic Movies Latin America. Shawn really missed getting to see good films on TCM, and from the moment he learned that basic digital cable offered the Latin American version here (and confirmed that they carried the original soundtracks on the SAP), he was determined to get it. When we decided to finally get a digital video recorder, we decided it was time to upgrade to digital cable.
Since getting it, my biggest frustration has been the slow loss of SAP in English on nearly every channel that had it when we first signed up - Discovery Channel, The National Geographic Channel, Retro, and Fox. Calls to our Megacable's customer service to complain about this only get us the response that they are not to blame; they just pass on what they get from their upstream provider to their clients. For some reason, they can not be bothered to take it up with their upstream provider that they are no longer getting the level of service that they paid for. No, because the vast majority of their customers do not have a need for the SAP, they will do nothing about it.
Having to watch programming dubbed over into another language, scorched free of any ambient sound into a a sterile, lifeless soundtrack where the words do not match the lips of the actors is disturbing. Having nothing but that kind of viewing experience slowly makes you feel like you are going insane. Imagine if all the shows you could watch were like Hong Kong action films or the judging panel from Iron Chef; there is no connection between what your eyes see and what your ear hears, even if you understand what is being said.
As maddening as that is, our most recent annoyance with our cable comes from the Latin American versions of popular channels themselves. One would think it might even bother the majority of their customers, although I still doubt that many will complain about it.
This fresh hell comes in the form of channels carrying programs for which they show only a handful of episodes, repeating the same ones over and over, even though many more exist. We first noticed this with Discovery Travel and Living. They run one of our favorite shows, Globetrekker, an hour-long, in-depth travel program. The promotions for the show that they run even push the fact that there are over 100 episodes of it, but it seems that they only show, say, 10 different episodes in any period of 3 or 4 months. When they add new programs, they do not cycle all the old ones out. They add the new ones in drips and drabs, taking an old show out of rotation here and there.
We recently started getting The Big Bang Theory, which I watch because I think Jim Parsons is super hot. The only problem is, WB Latin America, the channel that shows it five times a week here, shows only four different episodes. Shawn and I have numbered them, and we make bets on which one will be the one on when they show it. "Will tonight be episode one again, or episode four?" What is even more frustrating is the fact that they run lots of ads showing scenes from episodes that are not these four. They tease us with thinking they are going to show a new one, but then it is just one of the four we have seen time and time again.
Just recently, we were delighted to find that we could watch Charlie's Angels at 2 am, Tuesdays and Thursdays, on TCM Latin America. We would wait up, snuggle up on the couch at five to two, and prepare ourselves for those golden opening strains of the theme song and the narrative explaining how the three little girls from the police academy came to work for Charles Townsend. It was the best 70s cheese we had gotten since they started carrying Wonder Woman. But soon our late-night ritual was soured when we realized they were only showing the first season, and even then, repeating the same few episodes over and over again.
I had been grousing about how we should switch from Megacable to SKY TV or maybe even some other alternative, but when the channels are the same on the competing carriers, what use would it be?
It is maddening because it is yet another case where, coming from the United States, one can see that the foreign product of American companies exported to Latin America is often astoundingly inferior, and they just do not seem to care. The green tea frappuccino at Starbucks® here is made without the melon syrup (and thus sucks rocks). Wal-Mart carries Gatorade® here, but only the nasty lemon-lime kind, not the more palatable orange. One can buy a T-Fal® iron here, but the warranty is only good in the United States and Canada. They want our cash and warm bodies in front of the tube, but they cannot be bothered to provide the same level of service and selection that they provide in the United States. It is imperialism of the worst kind.
As a citizen of the country where so many of these businesses come from, it is embarrassing that they have such terrible offerings in their products and services, especially when they are so expensive relative to local buying power. Of course, nobody here complains, so there is no reason to expect that foreign companies will shape up and improve their service. A couple of years ago, when Mexicans organized a one-day boycott of American products referred to as nada gringo or "nothing gringo," to protest the treatment Mexican immigrants to the United States were receiving, people just went out the day before and stocked up on all the American products they were not supposed to buy on the official boycott date. With consumer consciousness like that, what else can one expect?
Posted by crispy at September 10, 2008 10:39 AM
Comments
Thanks for the post. Would be interested to hear more about the quality of service you receive from Megacable.
Posted by: Rajneesh at September 11, 2008 06:30 AM
The gringo boycott reminds me of periodic calls to avoid buying gasoline for a day. One guy called me at the newspaper office and said many people don't have email so we should publish the boycott information so people can join in.
I explained that the boycott would have no effect unless people refused to drive for a day as well. He sounded sad and discouraged.
Posted by: Mark Allen at September 11, 2008 10:51 AM
I LOVE globetrekker, I HATE cable companies
Posted by: Akira at September 11, 2008 11:50 AM
It worries me that so many of your posts are so negative about Mexico. Are you thinking of moving elsewhere?
[crispy says: Actually, it has been discussed, but probably not. We'll have to see how Plan Mérida is carried out.]
Posted by: Cristina at September 13, 2008 02:30 AM